这篇作文存在一些语法和表达问题,需要进一步修改和完善。以下是对这篇作文的批改和评分:
1. 需要修正语法错误和句子结构问题:
"Nowadays Exercise Every Day is becoming More and more important, often exercise can keep one's body health in our life."
修改为:
"Nowadays, exercising every day is becoming more and more important for maintaining good health."
2. 句子表达需要清晰和连贯:
"I can running one hour that after work, keep exercise every day, it can give me relaxing in the work, promote work finished. exercise can make new friends."
修改为:
"After work, I can run for one hour every day. Regular exercise not only helps me relax after work, but also improves my performance. Additionally, exercising can help me make new friends."
3. 语言需要更加连贯和自然:
"I love exercise every day, because exercise every day can make one's strive to become a better person."
修改为:
"I enjoy exercising daily because it motivates me to strive to become a better person."
综合评分意见:
- 内容:2/5 分。文章主题明确,但需要更多具体细节来支撑论点。
- 表达:2/5 分。语法错误较多,表达不够清晰和连贯。
- 结构:2/5 分。需要更好的段落结构和逻辑顺序。
- 总体评分:6/15 分。文章有待进一步修改和提升。 |