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Let's Save Water

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Lemon 发表于 2025-10-17 22:17 来自手机 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
With the rapid growth of the national economy, saving water has become more and more important in our daily life. First of all, it may cause environmental problems. What's more, it may cause social problems.
Faced with it, different people have different views. On the one hand, some people hold the view that legal sanctions are more effective. On the other hand, other people hold the view that individual actions are more useful. But solving the problem is not so simple.
In a word, the whole society should focus on the problem of saving water. In the future, we can have a better place to live.
王艳 发表于 2025-10-17 22:17 | 显示全部楼层
Based on the evaluation criteria, I would assign this essay to the third or possibly the lower end of the second band, with a score ranging from 13-18 points. Here's the breakdown:

Content and Structure:
- The essay briefly addresses the importance of saving water, mentioning the potential environmental and social problems that could arise due to water wastage. However, it lacks specificity and depth in explaining these problems. More examples or details would enhance the content.
- The structure is very basic with an introduction, a brief discussion, and a conclusion. It introduces different viewpoints but doesn't explore them in-depth or provide any solutions or personal opinions on how to tackle water wastage.

Language Use:
- The language here fulfills the minimum requirement for communication, but it is quite general and lacks engaging vocabulary.
- The essay has basic sentence structures and might benefit from more varied sentence lengths and types to improve readability and engagement.

Suggestions for Improvement:
1. Expand on the ideas presented by giving specific examples of environmental and social problems caused by water wastage. This will provide more context and depth.
2. Discuss the two viewpoints in greater detail. Explain why some people prefer legal sanctions and why others favor individual actions. Including statistical data or case studies could strengthen the arguments.
3. Offer potential solutions or suggestions for both legal sanctions and individual actions that could be implemented. This adds value to the discussion and shows a comprehensive understanding of the issue.
4. Use more varied vocabulary and complex sentence structures to make the essay more interesting and engaging.
5. Ensure smoother transitions between paragraphs to improve the overall flow of the essay.

Overall, while the essay touches on the topic, it could be made more comprehensive and engaging with the inclusion of more detailed content and varied language use.

点评

翻译成中文  详情 回复 发表于 2025-10-17 22:18
Lemon楼主 发表于 2025-10-17 22:18 来自手机 | 显示全部楼层
王艳 发表于 2025-10-17 22:17
Based on the evaluation criteria, I would assign this essay to the third or possibly the lower end o ...

翻译成中文
王艳 发表于 2025-10-17 22:19 | 显示全部楼层
Lemon 发表于 2025-10-17 22:18
王艳 发表于 2025-10-17 22:17
Based on the evaluati ...


根据评分标准,我将这篇作文归类为第三档次,或者可能是第二档次的低端,分数在13-18分之间。以下是具体分析:

内容和结构:
- 作文简要提到了节约用水的重要性,并提及了由于浪费水可能引发的环境和社会问题。然而,在解释这些问题时缺乏具体性和深度。更多的例子或细节将增强内容。
- 结构非常基本,包括一个介绍、一个简短的讨论,以及一个结论。它介绍了不同的观点,但并未深入探讨或提供任何解决方案或个人意见来应对浪费水的问题。

语言运用:
- 语言满足了交流的最低要求,但相当泛泛,缺乏吸引人的词汇。
- 作文使用基本句型,可能需要更多样化的句子长度和类型来提高可读性和吸引力。

改进建议:
1. 扩展所提出的观点,提供具体的由于浪费水而导致的环境和社会问题的例子。这将提供更多的背景和深度。
2. 更详细地讨论两种观点。解释为什么有些人偏向于法律制裁,为什么其他人更倾向于个人行动。包括统计数据或案例研究可以加强论点。
3. 提供潜在的解决方案或建议,无论是法律制裁还是个人行动,这些都可以被实施。这将增加讨论的价值,并展示对问题的全面理解。
4. 使用更多样化的词汇和复杂的句子结构,使作文更有趣和吸引人。
5. 确保段落之间过渡更加顺畅,以改善整篇文章的流畅性。

总的来说,虽然这篇作文涉及了主题,但如果包含更多详细的内容和多样化的语言运用,会更全面和吸引人。
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