With the rapid growth of the national economy, saving water has become more and more important in our daily life. First of all, it may cause environmental problems. What's more, it may cause social problems.
Faced with it, different people have different views. On the one hand, some people hold the view that legal sanctions are more effective. On the other hand, other people hold the view that individual actions are more useful. But solving the problem is not so simple.
In a word, the whole society should focus on the problem of saving water. In the future, we can have a better place to live.
Based on the evaluation criteria, I would assign this essay to the third or possibly the lower end of the second band, with a score ranging from 13-18 points. Here's the breakdown:
Content and Structure:
- The essay briefly addresses the importance of saving water, mentioning the potential environmental and social problems that could arise due to water wastage. However, it lacks specificity and depth in explaining these problems. More examples or details would enhance the content.
- The structure is very basic with an introduction, a brief discussion, and a conclusion. It introduces different viewpoints but doesn't explore them in-depth or provide any solutions or personal opinions on how to tackle water wastage.
Language Use:
- The language here fulfills the minimum requirement for communication, but it is quite general and lacks engaging vocabulary.
- The essay has basic sentence structures and might benefit from more varied sentence lengths and types to improve readability and engagement.
Suggestions for Improvement:
1. Expand on the ideas presented by giving specific examples of environmental and social problems caused by water wastage. This will provide more context and depth.
2. Discuss the two viewpoints in greater detail. Explain why some people prefer legal sanctions and why others favor individual actions. Including statistical data or case studies could strengthen the arguments.
3. Offer potential solutions or suggestions for both legal sanctions and individual actions that could be implemented. This adds value to the discussion and shows a comprehensive understanding of the issue.
4. Use more varied vocabulary and complex sentence structures to make the essay more interesting and engaging.
5. Ensure smoother transitions between paragraphs to improve the overall flow of the essay.
Overall, while the essay touches on the topic, it could be made more comprehensive and engaging with the inclusion of more detailed content and varied language use.